My confession and the Grace I didn't know I needed

A personal reflection inspired by Fr. Chris Alar’s video on confession.

“A quiet moment with God, a little reflection, and a whole lot of Laura Weller heart!”

Besties, can we have a little heart-to-heart? ❤️

Have you ever gone to confession thinking you had it all figured out… only to discover that God still had something to teach you?

Well, Besties, that was me!

Last week, I stumbled upon a video by Fr. Chris Alar about things we should avoid saying or thinking when we go to confession. And let me tell you… it made me stop, think, and do a little soul-searching!

Now, please don't mistake me for someone who has mastered holiness. Oh, goodness, NO! 😂 I am a work in progress, just like many of you. I am still learning, still growing, and still discovering that God's mercy is so much greater than my mess.

Four things really caught my attention. And I thought, Laura, darling, this is worth sharing!

1. “I have nothing to confess!”

Really? NOTHING? Not even a little something? 😂

Sometimes we think we haven't done anything terribly wrong. We might remember the little things but overlook the deeper matters of the heart.

Have I been impatient? Have I spoken unkindly? Have I held on to resentment when I could have chosen forgiveness? Have I been so busy explaining myself that I forgot to listen?

Oh my! There's some food for thought right there!

I'm learning that confession isn't about hunting for faults or beating ourselves up. It's about asking God to help us see ourselves honestly.

We don't need to manufacture a list of sins. We simply need to be open to the truth about our hearts.

And that, my friends, takes humility.

2. “I'm sorry, BUT…”

Ohhh, that little word BUT! 😂

“I’m sorry, BUT she started it!”

“I’m sorry, BUT you don't understand what I was going through!”

“I’m sorry, BUT I was tired!”

Sound familiar? Don't look at me like that, Besties. I suspect we've all been there at some point!

Of course, circumstances matter. People hurt us, life gets complicated, and sometimes we really are exhausted. But there's a difference between explaining what happened and taking responsibility for our own response.

It's easy to say we're sorry while quietly building a defence for why we were right.

True humility asks us to look at our part.

Can I say, “Lord, I got that wrong. Help me do better next time”?

Not because everyone else is innocent, but because I am responsible for my own choices.

Now THAT is something to reflect on!

3. “I will never be able to stop!”

Have you ever struggled with something for so long that you thought, “Well, this is just how I am. I'm never going to change”?

I think many of us have had that conversation with ourselves.

Maybe it's a habit, a reaction, a weakness, or a pattern we keep repeating. After a while, we stop believing change is possible.

But Besties, let's not give up on ourselves before we've even begun!

We may not change overnight. We may stumble along the way. And goodness knows, we cannot do everything by sheer willpower.

But we can make a sincere decision to try. We can ask God for help. We can take one small step in a better direction.

Humility says, “I struggle.” Despair says, “There's no hope for me.” Those are two very different things.

I want to keep making room for God's grace in my life. I don't have to pretend that change is easy. I just have to be willing to keep trying.

One step at a time, with His help.

4. Deliberately withholding a serious sin

This one is important, Besties.

Confession calls for honesty. If someone knowingly hides a serious sin rather than bringing it honestly to the sacrament, that is something to address with a priest.

And if you later realize you deliberately withheld something important, please don't let embarrassment or fear keep you away. Speak honestly with a priest and explain what happened.

The answer isn't to run away from God. It's to return and seek guidance.

We don't need to dress ourselves up in perfection before approaching Him. We come because we need His mercy.

God already knows our hearts. We aren't telling Him something He doesn't know. We're choosing to stop hiding and be honest.

That thought brings me comfort.

A little preparation… and a whole lot of honesty!

There were also some practical reminders in the video that I found helpful.

Pray before confession. Take a quiet moment to prepare your heart.

Bring a list if you need one. If you're nervous or tend to forget things, there's absolutely no prize for trying to remember everything under pressure!

Ask for guidance if you're worried about a past confession. You don't have to carry that uncertainty alone.

Trust God's forgiveness after absolution. Don't keep dragging the same forgiven sins back into the room as though His mercy wasn't enough. If you're uncertain about a particular situation, ask your priest for guidance.

I especially want to remember that last point. Sometimes we can be harder on ourselves than we need to be. We receive forgiveness, yet continue carrying the burden as if we haven't been forgiven.

At some point, we have to trust the mercy we've received and allow ourselves to move forward in peace.

What I'm taking to heart ❤️🙏

Sitting here beneath this magnificent sky, I am reminded that there is still so much to learn about God's love, His mercy, and my own heart.

I'm not sharing this because I have all the answers. I'm sharing because something touched me, made me think, and reminded me that my spiritual journey is still unfolding.

I don't need to pretend to be perfect.

I don't need to defend every mistake.

I don't need to believe that I'm beyond change.

And I certainly don't need to hide from God when I need Him most.

I can come honestly. I can ask for help. I can acknowledge where I've fallen short and sincerely try to do better.

And when I receive His forgiveness, I can learn to accept it with gratitude instead of continuing to punish myself.

Besties, confession isn't about performing perfection for God. It's about showing up with an honest heart and being willing to let His grace work in us.

So, if you've been nervous about confession, unsure what to say, or afraid to take that step, consider speaking with a priest. You don't have to have every word perfectly arranged.

Come honestly. Ask for guidance. Take that next step.

Because our story isn't over yet!

And thank God for that! ❤️

With love, faith, and a grateful heart,

Laura Weller

Faith. Resilience. Purpose. Legacy.